miracles again for future pilgrims

by mother explosives

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A collection of several more machines


released July 9, 2014



all rights reserved


mother explosives Brevard, North Carolina

Mother Explosives has lived all of his life in the Great Appalachian Valley.

His songs feel familiar until you spend more and more time in them and ultimately realize there are corners of this house you haven’t looked in before. It is warm, encompassing, different. These are songs you can walk around in. Songs you can sow into the lining of your jacket
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Track Name: pitch pine tree
we put the dog to sleep
cried most of saturday
we named
the ones we'd catch and save
never to see the light again

i dug a hole beneath the pitch pine tree
you cried you cried while i wept and dug
the dirt wiped the sweat and stared at you
your tiny hands gripped the edges of my shirt
let's put our minds at ease and use bottles we can't use
everyday and in a way that leads us both to say

i was weak
now i'm strong
my only weakness was thinking
i was lost and sober

you look fine
in the way
you address the reckless
parts of my audience
my sordidness of heart

we moved out of that place
to chop the walnut frame she stops
short of laughing in a way
no he don't deserve my tears not today
we put down payments on the moving truck
and sang old songs on the piano on the bench
in the back of it
the line haul charges won't change my hopes of hopes
of moving minutes from where we come from
who cares where we go
dramamine dog in my clothes old notes from dad
songs i wrote on the door on the fridge in the kitchen
in the dark

said "you're gonna love me when you gonna love me the same?"
Track Name: marguerite
i called everybody in my whole
god damned phone
nobody picked up
i took all the money from
my bank account
all my funds are dried up
i all the money and i went out west
i laid my head in topeka for a rest
i met a girl named marguerite
she took my money left me
broke and asleep
nobody picks up
the pieces i leave in the places i have been
the mess that i'll make with my lies and friends
i close my eyes i cant fall asleep
the pillow keeps talking
talking to me
Track Name: for a friend (beneath the ponderosa pines)
you shot yourself while i was killing
my ego
in North Carolina it never snows
in these mountains
we told lies to each other
to the mountains
when we'd drink

I hear it's snowing right now
in Keno this December
while someone pounds the Hammond
organ down in the valley
singing to themselves
as the snows fall
and the song lifts:
the sun goes down tonight
i thought there'd be more bodies
after such a long lonely fight
in fact there are none
except for the one
hidden under ponderosa pines

one more lone coyote looks over
his right shoulder
before he disappears into the Cascade
mountains again i've never been
i bet it's lovely in the spring

Maybe we find you
Maybe we don't
I'd rather go on thinking
with droplets of hope
how you've gone surfing in the South Pacific or somewhere speaking
broken Spanish to the local woman and singing
Track Name: shadow without a man
yesterday came and went and today became yesterday again you commented on the comet as it passed overhead i placed a coma in to keep the world apart and keep the words inside my heart instead of falling on the ground like a shadow without a man to follow him around and swallow all of your insides i still might if you'd allow it swallow your insides
you could take my trouble away
the funny thing about the trouble is it comes back but it still temporarily goes away
go away i'm not coming home i spent too long on the other side on the wrong side of the long rode i'm not coming and you can't make me just you wait and see i'll be fine no woe is me content to call this home even though you went away it is still where i remain even though
is this the beginning or is this the end i don't know i can't remember it i paced for fifteen minutes in one sock sliding across the carpet with my hands waving free all the pain i use to feel with a smile strapped on tight i didn't make my bed i didn't even the make it to the floor at the top of the stairs staring at the empty pill bottle as i go buzzing out the door
Track Name: lydia
it's a lie it's a secret it's the way i feel it's a hungry it's a lonely it's a keel keel keel it's knowing i am lost it's knowing i am wrong i get lost in these mountains i get lost in my home lydia didn't want to come i said i knew the way she followed me cross ridges and she followed me cross streams what's the point in using maps what's the point in reading maps if i'm blind and i'm drunk and i'm lying to myself
stop the rain when i'm crying tell the wind i can't breath while the valleys grow deeper with the secrets that i'll keep crumpled in my pockets folded in my hand dog-eared and torn and yet i'm still just a man
make me love when i hate shine light where its dark i'm going to keep on hoping through the gloom and disheart to forgive all the wrong sing harmony over the clamor then forget myself bring joy and understanding
Track Name: when the band plays our song
i ain't getting much younger
since i moved down south
i've been learning to wait
it's been working out

you left in october
in a twin engine plane
with streaks of mascara
and my soggy bearded face

losing never been easy
it's almost too much to bear
it will always be painful
it will always be near
when the band plays our song

i ain't one for complaining
the hand i get dealt
but this big house is empty
and so is my chest
every movie i'm watching
my mind walks towards you
every aisle in grocery
makes me want you too

i guess i'll be alright
i'm sure i'll move on
find a girl in the next town
for now i'll write another song
it's two days till friday
another drunk weekend mess
i'll be calling at midnight
broken heart and collect
Track Name: i was afraid of you
i was afraid of you
when you walked up to my house
i can be so loud
when you wake up in my house
i could be yours
i could be boring
sitting alone thinking
Track Name: vibrations in the cellar
if you are sleeping i won't wake you when i come to bed you will not even hear me open drawers or drop my keys onto the hardwood floors

meet me at the rivers edge i'll teach you skipping stones and i'll think home was never meant for making anxious bones beneath you chest we swear too much i can't focus on the words you say without my own words getting ready escape move piles around the bookshelf i can't help if i work it i might stop it but it builds itself from in the middle of fingertips and carries all this oxygen i'm just a man with electric under skin under scored by what he says not who he is vibrations in the cellar are still just nothing or do the mean something to him bury stones in the backyard beside the shed make silent prayers so noone hears as i stare facing chestnut knob thinking i could save the world on my next turn or be a sumpter for those who wonder or still stumble in the dark i don't feel tired when awake i don't feel nothing at all "blow winds and crack your cheeks" i hope you screamed it i can see it on the mountain dance spin twisting i know you shouted if you come back i'll say more of what i should have though it's just words i can't sing them barely think them so i guess we'll wait and see then